It is never easy to decide to leave a home that has been loved and filled with friends and family. The garden speaks to us and we wonder if another person will love the roses or the orange tree the way we have. The neighbors are part of our life and we wonder if we will still see them.
For many people who remember the “nursing homes” of their parents’ day a retirement home seems to feel like being sent to a place where no one wants to go, and only those with no family who cared found themselves unhappily there. Many have asked their children to promise to never let that happen to them.
Today, however, the choices are many and the retirement homes are filled with people enjoying their senior years with others who are similar in age and interests. Instead of being home alone, they are making new friends, enjoying great food, and determining which activities are interesting. Many are taking up new hobbies, or enjoying old ones with others who enjoy the same activities.
If you are contemplating this move, close your eyes. Can you picture all of your favorite places in your home and all of your furniture as well as the fun you have had sharing your food and your garden with family and friends? If you can, then these pictures will go with you. You might even want to make a picture album of your favorite corners of the house and yard. Now think back. When you were first married, did you live in a large home? Were you any less happy in that tiny apartment?
These are all things to contemplate as you make the decision to move to a new home. In today’s Senior residences people can enjoy safety and freedom from the fear that something will happen and they will not have help in time. They are no longer responsible for the cleaning, laundry, cooking, shopping and gardening. Yet, they can still putter in the gardens of their new home or polish the furniture and knick-knacks they bring with them. They also have more time to enjoy their families and, best of all, they no longer have to feel like they are interrupting busy family schedules for assistance with errands and doctor appointments each time they need something. Their families can once again be with them for times to just enjoy each other.
The one thing that I have seen when working with Seniors is that, if they are going to move, sooner is better. When I see Seniors who wait until a health emergency forces a move, I find that they do not enter their new home ready for fun. They often say that they wish they had come sooner while they could still enjoy all that the residence and the new friends have to offer. It is always harder to make new friends and build a new life when health issues leave someone feeling weak and unable to participate. Those moves are much harder.
This is a very special time of life, with many options. I hope you fully enjoy yours, whatever decisions you make for the future of you and your family.
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